Our greatest national ancillary skill - teasing the English - has been on the critical list for some time. On the news that the touring team would feature a chap called Root, it sat up in bed, brushed its hair and took a little chicken soup, but things remained pretty dire.
Until now. The English team’s travelling menu - all 82 richly textured and hysterically detailed pages of it - is like a shot of super-concentrated foetal stem cells into the wasted arm of our domestic sledging industry.
The quinoa requests alone would keep a slips fielder sassing for days.
Bernie Ecclestone arrives at High Court. Shortly after this was taken he became trapped in [a] revolving door. (via BBC Sport - Champions League, England cricket, Tennis & AP McCoy)
Survive these multi-faceted attacks of miserableness, bile and personal agendas and – like an end-of-level boss – Bob Willis appears.
Presumably because he’s too miserable and clearly barking for commentary, he’s confined to the studio like a sporting Miss Haversham, only one whose trousers don’t fit properly.